Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.