Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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