worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Randomize
