the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
That's how pantless uber rides happen
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize