It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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