why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
The best revenge is premature balding
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
she peed on how many people?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
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