We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
