did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
3 2 1 whiskey
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
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