You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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