I think i sorta joined a cult last night
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
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