can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
I just googled if crying burns calories
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize
