I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
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