Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
