i jhust puked up my retainher.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
Dignity is for republicans.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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