I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
