using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Randomize
