Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
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