One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize
