All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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