gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize