adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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