I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
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