So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
just come out here and I will go home with you...
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
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