i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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