have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Randomize
