ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
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