You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
