Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
