Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
