Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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