is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
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So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
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It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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