We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
