all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Randomize
