i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize
