Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
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