I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
