he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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