i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Randomize