U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
Randomize
