I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Randomize
