would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Randomize
