I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
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