gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize