u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
