Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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