I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize