hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
I am available for nakedness
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Randomize
