You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
