is your mom at the bar?
Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research