Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
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