i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Randomize
