she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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